Have fun tonight and

Have fun tonight and don't forget to check your candy for razor blades.

Click here. [Listening to: Secret

Click here.

"Naturally, the common people don't

"Naturally, the common people don't want war, but after all, it is the leaders of a country who determine the policy, and it is always a simple matter to drag people along whether it is a democracy, or a fascist dictatorship, or a parliament, or a communist dictatorship. Voice or no voice, the people can always be brought to the bidding of the leaders. This is easy. All you have to do is to tell them they are being attacked, and denounce the pacifists for lack of patriotism and exposing the country to danger. It works the same in every country."

Hermann Goering, 1939
Hitler's Reich-Marshall

"Terrorism is the best political weapon for nothing drives people harder than a fear of sudden death."

Adolf Hitler

In no particular order:

In no particular order: Sephora, Salaam Bombay, H&M, Luca Lounge, 7A, 7B, Avenue A, East, Chow Bar, International Bar, Cucina & Co in the basment of Macy's, Patricia Field's, Battery Park City, Garden of Eden, SYMS, Century 21, Canal Street, Otto Tootsie, Anthropology, Dos Caminos, Madame X, Boxers, Magnolia Bakery, Toys R Us in Times Square, Ruby Foos, Bond Street, Bar 89, The Bronx Zoo, Central Park, Crate and Barrel, UCB Theater, St Marks Church, Other Music, The Screening Room, Katz'z Deli, Max Fish's, Yuma, Madison Square Park, Chelsea Flea Market, Aldo's, The Frying Pan and I'm sure I'll think of more...

Me and the girls

Me and the girls went to brunch today at The Coffee Shop. Afterwards, Melody and Julie went to buy a box, while Shultzie, Laura and I went shoe shopping and to look for any item that said Willy Wonka for a friend of Shultzie's. Laura and I weren't much help in deciding what shoes Shultz should get. They were all like 300 bucks and only semi-cute. Shultzie was shopping like it was going out of style, but I guess she just wants to stock up on some things before she moves to Seattle next month. We totally by chance came across a book about the making of Willie Wonka which made Shultz pretty happy. Then I dragged her down to Soho to go to Patricia Field's. She had never been before and it was right up her alley. I saw a couple of shirts there that I really wanted but they were way too expensive. I still can't understand people who spend $200 bucks on a T-shirt. Anyway, it was a fun day and a great way to spend my last weekend in town! Thanks Guys!

Well kids, it is to

Well kids, it is to my great regret that I will be going on hiatus from NYC for a while. Due to the complexities of life I have decided to go home to Memphis for a while and see how things progress. After 5 years living in NY, I have to say that there isn't much I haven't done or seen, and it's all been a great experience. Hopefully I will be back soon because I have made a lot of really great friends here.

And on the bright side, I have come across a myriad of old friends due to perusing friendster and various other Memphis related websites. I am really looking forward to going back and catching up with people that I haven't been in contact with in 8 or 9 years. The Memphis music scene seems to be alive and kicking. I always felt like I was really lucky to know so many genuinely talented people in that scene.

So, Novemeber 1st is my day of arrival. Mark your calendars.

Death Death is cheerful and

Death

Death is cheerful and pleasant as she meets people
at their moment of parting the earth and holds
their hand as she takes them to the next stage.


Sandman - Which member of the Endless are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

So me and some

So me and some of my peeps hit the town last night. First we went to Motor City Bar on the LES to see Shultzie's friends' band, Alabama Rattlesnakes. They were not bad musically, but I'm telling you, you know that you must be getting old when you find the latest hipster clothing trends to be infinitely amusing. I don't get this whole "Kings of Leon" look; trucker hats, satin jackets, spinal tap haircuts and facial hair. Somebody please let me in on the joke, cause that's what it is right? I've seen pictures of my dad dressed like this in the '70's and you know what? It was ugly then and it's ugly now. You know, maybe since I grew up in the south and there has always been a segment of the population there that dressed like this without a hint of irony, I just can't get into it.

Next we headed over to Culture Club to rock out to the eighties for Scott's birthday. I still can't believe the cover for this place is $20! What a ripoff! The place wreaks of velveeta. We got in free from our VIP pass scam, but still got screwed by the $12 drinks. Laura got hit on as usual. The B&T guys really have a thing for her!

Coolest Moment of the Night: when the DJ played the 20 minute version of Tainted Love (worst. song. ever) I drunkenly screamed at him for 5 minutes from the dancefloor to play The Cure. Although he pretended to ignore me, the next song was Just Like Heaven. I RULE!!!

My neighborhood used to be

My neighborhood used to be so cool. I live two blocks south of Ground Zero and before the Twin Towers fell, it was an awesome place to live. I used to be able to walk right thru the mall under the World Trade center and straight up Greenwich Street into Tribeca, it took about 10 minutes. But today, when I went to take my dog to the groomer, it literally took me an hour to walk around Ground Zero and up Church St. and then back over to Greenwich. There are literally thousands of tourists on Church in front of the plaques every single day, and although I guess I can kind understand why people want to go there and see it for themselves, they are still a major pain in my ass. At least they finally reopened the Borders on Broadway. I used to go to the one in the WTc all of the time and it was my main source for books and CD's. It makes me sad to think about how awesome this neighborhood used to be and how I'll be long gone before it's cool again.

"Fo shizzle ma nizzle" is

"Fo shizzle ma nizzle" is a bastardization of "fo' sheezy mah neezy" which is a bastardization of "for sure mah nigga" which is a bastdardization of "I concur with you whole heartedly my African American brother"

Urban Dictionary.

Wil Wheaton [Listening to: The

Wil Wheaton

Two families move from Pakistan

Two families move from Pakistan to America.
When they arrive the two fathers make a bet
- in a year's time whichever family has
become more American will win.

A year later they meet again:
The first man says, "My son is playing baseball,
I had McDonalds for breakfast and I'm on my
way to pick up a case of Bud, how about you?"

The second man replies, "Fuck you, towelhead."

Disclaimer: Racism sucks, but have a sense of humor, damnit!

So, I've been hearing

So, I've been hearing alot about this new band, The Darkness, supposedly the next big thing. They played a gig at The Bowery Ballroom in September and seemed to be all the rage according to all the hipsters. Then today, I saw their new video on VH1. America, are you ready for The Darkness? Decide for yourself.

I Believe in a Thing Called Love

It always sucks to wake

It always sucks to wake up to news that another musician has taken his or her own life. From initial reports, that seems to be what Elliot Smith did yesterday. If you're not familair with his work, you might remember his Academy Award nominated song from Good Will Hunting, Miss Misery. I guess Elliot was pretty miserable himself. I was not a huge fan, but I had two of his albums and even saw him on the street a couple of times in NYC. There's still chance that this is a hoax, afterall, it is being reported by NME.

So, I went to

So, I went to North 6 tonight to see Pretty Girls Make Graves. I got in free since I know the owner Jeff from when I worked on "Best of iT" and we interveiwed him about North 6 being one of the best live music venues in NYC. I have heard a lot of hype about this band and thought they were pretty good. I had a hard time understanding a lot of the lyrics, I guess I'll have to buy the album. They still need a little fine tuning, but overall, a great performance.

Margaret Cho

Margaret Cho

U.S. Budget Deficit Hits Record

U.S. Budget Deficit Hits Record $374.2B

You are Professional Widow Faerie!

You are Professional Widow Faerie! You don't take
anyone's shit. You are strong and beautiful and
can be dangerous as well. Check out this song
to find your own personal meaning.

~Which Tori Amos Faerie Are You~
brought to you by Quizilla

A new study published in

A new study published in the latest edition of the journal Molecular Brain Research states that sexual identity is wired into the genes, which discounts the concept that homosexuality and transgender sexuality are a choice. Read the article here. Hopefully, this will add weight to the argument that everyone deserves equal protection under the law.

Although Boone screwed Pettitte out

Although Boone screwed Pettitte out of a shutout, the Yanks are back on track. If you didn't see the game, you can catch up on the details here. Oh, and for those who have emailed me about being a fair-weather Yankee fan, although it is true that I have not always been a fan, in 2000 I bought my boyfriend season tickets for the Yankees and had to trek out to the Bronx every weekend all summer long, so I've earned the right to call myself a fan. Thanks.

David Blaine survived his latest

David Blaine survived his latest stunt which he calls his hardest and "also the most beautiful." You can read about his hijinks here.

So, my ex-boyfriend once told

So, my ex-boyfriend once told me that I have the interests of a 14 year old girl. He's just jealous cause I'm like super-cool. Anyway, if it's true then I guess my life is a little like this. Btw, if he's reading this, I understand Derrida, I just think it's crap.

After reading a story in

After reading a story in the NY Daily News about 15 year-old hasidic girls who fled their strict home and Orthodox Community, I have been perusing a blog called Hasidic Rebel. I admit, being from the south, I had no idea what a Hasidic Jew was until I moved to NYC. My first introduction was when I applied for a job waiting tables in the summer of '99. I was doing an internship and needed the extra income. I had an interview with a man that refused to shake my hand. I went back to Mtv, where my internship was, and asked the people I worked with what was up with that. They weren't sure until I mentioned that he looked to be "one of those serious jews from the movies." Then I was told that they don't touch women because they are considered dirty because they menstruate. "Well, what about their wives? What about sex?" I asked. "They use a sheet with a hole in it." OOOOO-KAY.

I like debunking myths, and this has been an eye opening blog. So do they really use a sheet with a hole in it when they have sex? I guess you'll just have to read th blog and find out for yourself.

It seems that the people

It seems that the people in Memphis are F-A-T. According to a ranking of 101 cities in the US in terms of healthy lifestyles, Memphis came in dead-last. The city failed in the areas of Fitness, Health and Quality of Life. You can find out who was rated first here. I'm not judging, I myself have struggled with my weight. My plan is to put this french fry down and read this.

From Aintitcool.com: It seems there’s

From Aintitcool.com:
It seems there’s a strong possibility that many of the LORD OF THE RINGS cast will return for additional filming next year. Why? Won’t RETURN OF THE KING have already been released? Seems the extra footage may be used in the DVD Extended Edition for ROTK. Could this be more footage for the ending that fans are beginning to sweat about? The scouring of the Shire? Or could it be for a larger LOTR box set, the Tom Bombadil sequence that Jackson said (pre-FOTR release) he’d love to go back and film?

It ain't easy being mean

Scientists have discovered the reason

Scientists have discovered the reason why songs by Britney Spears, Justin Timberlake and Jennifer Lopez get stuck in your head, even though you want to mutilate their vocal chords. It's a phenomenon know as the "earworm" and it can strike anyone at anytime. It does not discriminate and is likely to infect people of all creeds, colors and classes. Hopefully, within our lifetime, a cure will be found.

Bill Maher [Listening to: Something

Bill Maher

Find your inner Smurf!

Find your inner Smurf!

"I sincerely hope a new

"I sincerely hope a new generation will stand up that says: let’s develop our brains and not our bodies. Girls that will say to a Christina Aguilera: you think you’re a strong woman because you show your red thong? Get a grip and put on some clothes."-Tori Amos

Lately, I have been reading

Lately, I have been reading alot of this blog, Baghdad's Burning. If you have any interest in the conflict over our occupation of Iraq, you should be too. It is written by a 24 year old Iraqi woman who was brought up abroad and then returned to Iraq in her teens. She speaks fluent english and was a computer engineer before the war began. After the fighting was "declared" over, she was not allowed to return to her job because she was a woman and now must be escorted if she leaves her home by two male "bodyguards" for her own safety. You see, the "liberation" of Iraq has been anything but liberating for women. Most have had to quit going to school, lost their jobs and have had to resort to wearing hijabs so they are not accosted by the fundamentalists who feel that this is the perfect time for their own revolution. I could go on, but it would be better if you turned off the tv and read what's really going on in Baghdad for yourself.

to be as she

to be as she

It is a night of ethereal pain, a song of dark desire,
wolves vent their howls. The ethereal one wakens.

Now a night of ecstasy, I rise.

Create your own here.

Melody and I went

Melody and I went to see Leona Naess open for Josh Rouse last night. She sounded great and certainly had a rapport with the audience, offering several times to share a drink with a fan if they could name the next song she intended to play. This, of course, backfired the first time she offered it as she had left her setlist at her feet and an avid fan standing in front of her at the stage read the song she was referrring to. She sounded great. She seemed a little intimidated when she first came on stage, however, after a few songs and swigs of her "tea and whiskey," she seemed to feel more comfortable. There were a few star sightings at the show including Gina Gershon, who looked awesome for 41, and Josh Charles.

You can check out Leona's music by streaming songs from her website.

Fiona says in a

Fiona says in a new Rolling Stone article that she is two weeks from completion of her follow up to When the Pawn. Rumor has it that she has split with long-time beau and Academy Award nominated director Paul Thomas Anderson. I must say, if this is true, be ready for one of the greatest albums ever made. Fiona is a genius when it comes to molding pain into art. She's made the mistake in the past of speaking candidly and saying exactly what she thinks, which has often been taken the wrong way and made her vilefied in the press. I know how she feels.

Mary. [Listening to: Happy

Mary.

But, would he have let

But, would he have let one of his students get away with this?

"Finding the world in the smallness of a grain of sand,
And holding infinities in the palm of your hand,
And Heaven's realms in the seedlings of this tiny flower,
And enternities in the space of a single hour."
--Sting, "Send Your Love"

"To see a World in a Grain of Sand
And a Heaven in a Wild Flower,
Hold Infinity in the palm of your hand
And Eternity in an hour."
--William Blake, "Auguries of Innocence"

Ichi - "That one with

Ichi - "That one with wisdom"

What would your Japanese name be?
brought to you by Quizilla

Adoptacouple.com [Listening to: Ordinary World

Adoptacouple.com

The Yankees beat the Red

The Yankees beat the Red Sox for the opportunity to meet the Marlins in the World Series.

itunes for Windows launched today.

itunes for Windows launched today. You can download the application here. Over 400,000 songs for less than a buck each? Sounds good to me. Also, Pepsi is starting a promotion where there will be codes under caps for free songs. 1 in 3 will be winners. Looks like I'll be switching teams for a couple of months.

Like the minister from Kansas

Like the minister from Kansas who wants to erect a monument denouncing Matthew Shepard that says. ""Matthew Shepard entered Hell October 12, 1998, at age 21 in defiance of God's solemn warning: Thou shalt not lie with mankind as with womankind; it is abomination. Leviticus 18:22."

This is so obviously stupid and dumb, it isn't even worth posting why. But what is interesting about the story is that the minister is using a legal precedent to be able to use public property to mount that statue. The good Minister "claims that the presence of a Ten Commandments display in the city park means that all monuments must be allowed."

Something to think about for all those who have supported religious monuments being installed on public property. Read the whole story here.

Bush told his senior

Bush told his senior aides Tuesday that he "didn't want to see any stories" quoting unnamed administration officials in the media anymore, and that if he did, there would be consequences, said a senior administration official who asked that his name not be used.

Full article here.

Someone posted this on a

Someone posted this on a message board that I frequent and since you know what a dog lover I am, I wanted to help her out by posting it here too.

"A friend of mine is looking for a good home for a dog. The dog is really lovable and friendly with the kids, but his wife says the dog makes her nervous when he stares at her. She wants it out of the house. If you know of anyone that can take it, let me know."

Check the dog out here.

If you have always wondered

If you have always wondered how celebrities go from ordinary to fabulous, or from attractive to scary, check this site out. Personally, I don't see the difference in a lot of the pictures.

Cyndi Lauper - At Last

Cyndi Lauper - At Last (Daylight/Epic)
Release Date: November 18th, 2003.

Here's a collection of covers that I will be excited to buy. I fell in love with the standards album Am I Not Your Girl? by Sinead O'Conner, it made me go out and get Billie Holiday, Ella Fitzgerald, Nat King Cole, Frank Sinatra, Harry Connick Jr. There's just something about that music that makes a bubblebath even better. Cyndi Lauper will showcase her New album on Halloween at Joe's Pub

Aoccdrnig to rscheearch at Cmabrigde

Aoccdrnig to rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoetnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be at the rghit pclae.

The rset can be a toatl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe.

If you don't understand the title of this thread, check out some of Courtney's posts at hole.com.

Learn what it is here.

Learn what it is here.

Protest it here.

I think that this is

I think that this is a great idea, but will she still have to wear the headdress under her astronaut helmet?

According to this site, you

According to this site, you can be defined by your zipcode. I guess this makes sense, since many people tend to be drawn to live in areas with other like-minded people with similar interests and beliefs. My zip-code is 10006 and their asesssment of my area is pretty accurate, except that I don't shop at Banana Repulic. Not that there's anything wrong with that.

If you have a few

If you have a few moments to waste click here.

Those poor cubs fans. After

Those poor cubs fans. After watching tonight's game, I am starting to believe in that curse myself. I suspect pictures of that unfortunate cubs fan, along with his name and address, will be surfacing on the internet any moment.

You are Form 5, Dragon:

You are Form 5, Dragon: The Weaver.

"And The Dragon seperated the virtuous from
the sinful. He tore his eyes from his sockets
and used them to peer into the souls of those
on trial to make a judgement. He knew that
with endless knowledge came endless
responsibility."

Some examples of the Dragon Form are Athena
(Greek), St. Peter (Christian), and Surya
(Indian). The Dragon is associated with the concept of
intelligence, the number 5, and the element of
wood. His sign is the crescent moon.

As a member of Form 5, you are an intelligent and
wise individual. You weigh options by looking
at how logical they are and you know that while
there may not always be a right or wrong
choice, there is always a logical one. People
may say you are too indecisive, but it's only
because you want to do what's right. Dragons
are the best friends to have because they're
willing to learn.


Which Mythological Form Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

The threat against doctors who

The threat against doctors who speak candidly with patients about the option of medical marijuana were finally put to rest today when the Supreme Court cleared the way for state laws allowing doctors to speak openly with patients about the benefits of mary jane. However, according to this, we're still a long way from a breakthrough.

Next up, let's see if they are as clear headed on the Pledge case.

Go here if you would

Go here if you would like to experience the next great white rapper. You'll be glad you did. And remember, you saw it here first.

Looks like she isn't

Looks like she isn't hiding her feelings anymore! I need to get her new album and give it a few spins before her show on friday night at The Bowery Ballroom. I think it was written mostly before the break-up though, so no songs about the demise probably made it to the final cut. My friend told me a couple of days ago that Ryan and Parker Posey were seen at the Taco Bell on 3rd and 10th scarfing down burritoes. Ahhhh, to be a star!

Now why didn't we

Now why didn't we here about this poll when it came out. There is some pretty interesting information here. The New York Times must not have thought so, cause they buried it on page 16 and barely gave it 700 words. How did all the major news outlets miss this? Oh, yeah, we were all tuned into that totally engaging soap opera, California Recall. The media sucks. Congratulations California! You really deserve it!

The Britney Spears -

The Britney Spears - Christina Aguilera lesbian kiss! (Now I'll finally start getting some hits on this blog!) Now, why wasn't anybody up in arms over this? C'mon people! And I thought they didn't like each other!

I really have no idea

I really have no idea why Chris Columbus deserves a national holiday. I actually think that he has only made negative contributions to our society. Have you heard about the atrocities that this man is responsible for? It's just shameful. Oh and if anyone knows about a petition or any kind of national group trying to repeal this holiday, please let me know how to get involved.

So, researchers have figured out

So, researchers have figured out how to implant electrodes into the brains of monkeys to allow them move things with their minds. No, it's not science fiction, it's CNN.

I hope she got the

I hope she got the cookies I sent! I wasn't sure what to get her, don't people
in their 70's already have everything that they want? I just realized from this picture from my high school graduation, that we really look a lot alike! What do you think?

Proof WMP file. Give it

Proof

WMP file. Give it a few seconds to load

Seer The ULTIMATE personality test

Seer


The ULTIMATE personality test
brought to you by Quizilla

I went to see School

I went to see School of Rock tonight with Shultzie. It was actually a really funny movie, and I usually hate comedies. It made me wish I had stuck with those guitar lessons when I was 10. Damn you parents for letting me have my way! The kids really could play well and Jack Black was hysterical. Can't wait to see some of the bands that those kids end up forming

So, last night I had

So, last night I had the pleasure of attending my friend Lindsay's last big bash before she has to move out of her killer apartment on East 10th and 4th. She lives directly across the street from Webster Hall and they let everyone that lives on the block in free to all the shows. Hmmmm, may be I live there too ;)

Anyway, I went early to get in some real face time with Lindsay before it turned into a madhouse, which it did by midnight. Have you ever left a party because there were just too many people? When my friends and I caught a glimpse of Kurt Loder all I could think was, "Damn, that dude is old!" I guess when celebrities crash your party, it's a success!

Anyway, we gathered our crew and decided to hit The Fat Black Pussycat on Macdougal in the West Village. It was packed but we managed to find a booth. Scott proceeded to entertain us with his table dancing. By 4, it was time to cruise. The night can't last forever. My friends Melody and Julie really wanted hotdogs from Gray's Papaya, so we said our farewell's to the boys and headed over in Melody's auto. She waited in her ride while Julie and I waited in line. For some reason, Julie and I started talking about phone sex. Some group of guys behind us overheard and one started begging Julie to have phone sex with him right then. She gave him her number, but then told him that she left her phone outside. So, this kid runs out to Melody and starts begging her for Julie's phone. She gave it to him! He brings it in and then gives it to Julie and calls her. Now everyone in the whole place is egging it on. But, of course, the best thing Julie can come up with now that she's dug herself into a hole in front of 30 people is, "So, what are you wearing?"

We got our food and vamoosed. It was funny.

Well, the Yankees vs Red

Well, the Yankees vs Red Sox game yesterday was quite a drama. I'm not saying that it wasn't fun to watch, it was a great game. I just have a few problems with what went down. For one thing, the Martinez pitch was wrong. Garcia had a right to be pissed. However, retaliating against the second baseman was also wrong. As much as it can be argued that the Martinez pitch was not done on purpose, Garcia's move did not have that argument. He should have been ejected from the game. See, the thing that sucks is that these men do not have to suffer any consequences for their actions. It's really a terrible message for everyone. Make a lot of money, play in a game that has been built up to mean so much, when in reality, it's truly meaningless, and you can get away with things that a normal person on the street can't. Why are the rules different in sports? If these players had to face some real consequences for acting out, maybe, just maybe, they would learn to control themselves and say, "Hey! I make a lot of money, playing baseball. There's not much you could do to piss me off enough that I would be willing to do something that might jeopardize that. I'm gonna play by the rules of fair play and just be happy to be here!"

Yeah Right - Pollyanna out

Ghettopoly: Is It A Racist,

Ghettopoly: Is It A Racist, Offensive Game?

NME: "Just when I thought

NME: "Just when I thought The Strokes saved rock and roll, Ryan
Adams saved it again. Stay tuned for next month, when somebody else
saves it."

Pitchforkmedia: "I'm going to talk about something completely
unrelated to music, something to show off my otherwise useless
English (or philosophy) degree. After taking up half of the text of
this review with said reference, I will somehow (in as loose and
ridiculous a manner as possible) tie it back into Ryan Adams, and
then say that this album isn't nearly as good as 'Heartbreaker; and
that none of his albums ever will be. Also, he's a rock and roll
sell out and we all should hate him."

Rolling Stone: "I haven't actually heard the record, but there's some guitars
and stuff in there. And I reckon he sings some good lyrics here and there.
Some people will really like it, some people will really hate it, translation: three stars."

I, myself, haven't heard it yet. I will let you know what I think when I do.

Vatican: condoms don't stop Aids

Vatican: condoms don't stop Aids

New research shows that SUVs

New research shows that SUVs pose serious risks to children and families, and that SUV owners in the U.S. each spent $350 extra on gas in 2002 - together more than $9 billion - over what they would have paid if SUVs were as efficient as automobiles. Automakers have the technology to improve fuel economy, but choose instead to bulk up the weight and acceleration of SUVs, costing SUV owners and other motorists lives and money.

If you haven't watched this

If you haven't watched this show, you need to go to your HBO ON DEMAND and do so NOW. Don't have HBO OD? What are you, a loser? Read about him here.

Our Neighbors to the north

Our Neighbors to the north may see an extreme upturn in tourism if this happens. And I thought Canadians were squares.

http://www.blackpeopleloveus.com/

http://www.blackpeopleloveus.com/

Q: Daddy, why did we

Q: Daddy, why did we have to attack Iraq?

A: Because they had weapons of mass destruction, honey.

Q: But the inspectors didn't find any weapons of mass
destruction.

A: That's because the Iraqis were hiding them.

Q: And that's why we invaded Iraq?

A: Yep. Invasions always work better than inspections.

Q: But after we invaded them, we STILL didn't find any weapons of
mass destruction, did we?

A: That's because the weapons are so well hidden. Don't worry,
we'll find something, probably right before the 2004 election.

Q: Why did Iraq want all those weapons of mass destruction?

A: To use them in a war, silly.

Q: I'm confused. If they had all those weapons that they planned
to use in a war, then why didn't they use any of those weapons
when we went to war with them?

A: Well, obviously they didn't want anyone to know they had those
weapons, so they chose to die by the thousands rather than defend
themselves.

Q: That doesn't make sense Daddy. Why would they choose to die if
they had all those big weapons to fight us back with?

A: It's a different culture. It's not supposed to make sense.

Q: I don't know about you, but I don't think they had any of
those weapons our government said they did.

A: Well, you know, it doesn't matter whether or not they had
those weapons. We had another good reason to invade them anyway.

Q: And what was that?

A: Even if Iraq didn't have weapons of mass destruction, Saddam
Hussein was a cruel dictator, which is another good reason to
invade another country.

Q: Why? What does a cruel dictator do that makes it OK to invade
his country?

A: Well, for one thing, he tortured his own people.

Q: Kind of like what they do in China?

A: Don't go comparing China to Iraq. China is a good economic
competitor where millions of people work for slave wages in
sweatshops to make U.S. corporations richer.

Q: So if a country lets its people be exploited for American
corporate gain, it's a good country, even if that country
tortures people?

A: Right.

Q: Why were people in Iraq being tortured?

A: For political crimes, mostly, like criticizing the government.
People who criticized the government in Iraq were sent to prison
and tortured.

Q: Isn't that exactly what happens in China?

A: I told you, China is different.

Q: What's the difference between China and Iraq?

A: Well, for one thing, Iraq was ruled by the Ba'ath party, while
China is Communist.

Q: Didn't you once tell me Communists were bad?

A: No, just Cuban Communists are bad.

Q: How are the Cuban Communists bad?

A: Well, for one thing, people who criticize the government in
Cuba are sent to prison and tortured.

Q: Like in Iraq?

A: Exactly.

Q: And like in China, too?

A: I told you, China's a good economic competitor. Cuba, on the
other hand, is not.

Q: How come Cuba isn't a good economic competitor?

A: Well, you see, back in the early 1960s, our government passed
some laws that made it illegal for Americans to trade or do any
business with Cuba until they stopped being Communists and
started being capitalists like us.

Q: But if we got rid of those laws, opened up trade with Cuba,
and started doing business with them, wouldn't that help the
Cubans become capitalists?

A: Don't be a smart-ass.

Q: I didn't think I was being one.

A: Well, anyway, they also don't have freedom of religion in
Cuba.

Q: Kind of like China and the Falun Gong movement?

A: I told you, stop saying bad things about China. Anyway, Saddam
Hussein came to power through a military coup, so he's not really
a legitimate leader anyway.

Q: What's a military coup?

A: That's when a military general takes over the government of a
country by force, instead of holding free elections like we do in
the United States.

Q: Didn't the ruler of Pakistan come to power by a military coup?

A: You mean General Pervez Musharraf? Uh, yeah, he did, but
Pakistan is our friend.

Q: Why is Pakistan our friend if their leader is illegitimate?

A: I never said Pervez Musharraf was illegitimate.

Q: Didn't you just say a military general who comes to power by
forcibly overthrowing the legitimate government of a nation is an
illegitimate leader?

A: Only Saddam Hussein. Pervez Musharraf is our friend, because
he helped us invade Afghanistan.

Q: Why did we invade Afghanistan?

A: Because of what they did to us on September 11th.

Q: What did Afghanistan do to us on September 11th?

A: Well, on September 11th, nineteen men, fifteen of them Saudi
Arabians hijacked four airplanes and flew three of them into
buildings, killing over 3,000 Americans.

Q: So how did Afghanistan figure into all that?

A: Afghanistan was where those bad men trained, under the
oppressive rule of the Taliban.

Q: Aren't the Taliban those bad radical Islamics who chopped off
people's heads and hands?

A: Yes, that's exactly who they were. Not only did they chop off
people's heads and hands, but they oppressed women, too.

Q: Didn't the Bush administration give the Taliban 43 million
dollars back in May of 2001?

A: Yes, but that money was a reward because they did such a good
job fighting drugs.

Q: Fighting drugs?

A: Yes, the Taliban were very helpful in stopping people from
growing opium poppies.

Q: How did they do such a good job?

A: Simple. If people were caught growing opium poppies, the
Taliban would have their hands and heads cut off.

Q: So, when the Taliban cut off people's heads and hands for
growing flowers, that was OK, but not if they cut people's heads
and hands off for other reasons?

A: Yes. It's OK with us if radical Islamic fundamentalists cut
off people's hands for growing flowers, but it's cruel if they
cut off people's hands for stealing bread.

Q: Don't they also cut off people's hands and heads in Saudi
Arabia?

A: That's different. Afghanistan was ruled by a tyrannical
patriarchy that oppressed women and forced them to wear burqas
whenever they were in public, with death by stoning as the
penalty for women who did not comply.

Q: Don't Saudi women have to wear burqas in public, too?

A: No, Saudi women merely wear a traditional Islamic body
covering.

Q: What's the difference?

A: The traditional Islamic covering worn by Saudi women is a
modest yet fashionable garment that covers all of a woman's body
except for her eyes and fingers. The burqa, on the other hand, is
an evil tool of Patriarchal oppression that covers all of a
woman's body except for her eyes and fingers.

Q: It sounds like the same thing with a different name.

A: Now, don't go comparing Afghanistan and Saudi Arabia. The
Saudis are our friends.

Q: But I thought you said 15 of the 19 hijackers on September
11th were from Saudi Arabia.

A: Yes, but they trained in Afghanistan.

Q: Who trained them?

A: A very bad man named Osama bin Laden.

Q: Was he from Afghanistan?

A: Uh, no, he was from Saudi Arabia too. But he was a bad man, a
very bad man.

Q: I seem to recall he was our friend once.

A: Only when we helped him and the mujahadeen repel the Soviet
invasion of Afghanistan back in the 1980s.

Q: Who are the Soviets? Was that the Evil Communist Empire Ronald
Reagan talked about?

A: There are no more Soviets. The Soviet Union broke up in 1990
or thereabouts, and now they have elections and capitalism like
us. We call them Russians now.

Q: So the Soviets, I mean the Russians, are now our friends?

A: Well, not really. You see, they were our friends for many
years after they stopped being Soviets, but then they decided not
to support our invasion of Iraq, so we're mad at them now. We're
also mad at the French and the Germans because they didn't help
us invade Iraq either.

Q: So the French and Germans are evil, too?

A: Not exactly evil, but just bad enough that we had to rename
French fries and French toast to Freedom Fries and Freedom Toast.

Q: Do we always rename foods whenever another country doesn't do
what we want them to do?

A: No, we just do that to our friends. Our enemies, we invade.

Q: But wasn't Iraq one of our friends back in the 1980s?

A: Well, yeah. For a while.

Q: Was Saddam Hussein ruler of Iraq back then?

A: Yes, but at the time he was fighting against Iran, which made
him our friend, temporarily.

Q: Why did that make him our friend?

A: Because at that time, Iran was our enemy.

Q: Isn't that when he gassed the Kurds?

A: Yeah, but since he was fighting against Iran at the time, we
looked the other way, to show him we were his friend.

Q: So anyone who fights against one of our enemies automatically
becomes our friend?

A: Most of the time, yes.

Q: And anyone who fights against one of our friends is
automatically an enemy?

A: Sometimes that's true, too. However, if American corporations
can profit by selling weapons to both sides at the same time, all
the better.

Q: Why?

A: Because war is good for the economy, which means war is good
for America. Also, since God is on America's side, anyone who
opposes war is a godless un-American Communist. Do you understand
now why we attacked Iraq?

Q: I think so. We attacked them because God wanted us to, right?

A: Yes.

Q: But how did we know God wanted us to attack Iraq?

A: Well, you see, God personally speaks to George W. Bush and
tells him what to do.

Q: So basically, what you're saying is that we attacked Iraq
because George W. Bush hears voices in his head?

A. Yes! You finally understand how the world works. Now close
your eyes, make yourself comfortable, and go to sleep. Good
night.

Good night, Daddy.

-@forumz

If you have always wanted

If you have always wanted to be more politically active, but are still waiting on someone to tell you how to do it, go here, sign up, vote, repeat.

A popular new Bible for

A popular new Bible for teen girls dresses up the New Testament to look and read exactly like a fashion magazine. It's called Revolve.

excerpt:

"As you apply your sunscreen," one reads, "use that time to talk to God. Tell him how grateful you are for how he made you. Soon, you'll be so used to talking to him, it might become as regular and intimate as shrinking your pores."

Go Yankees! I wore my

Go Yankees! I wore my new hat during the game tonight for luck.

Tickets for Trilogy Tuesday went

Tickets for Trilogy Tuesday went onsale today. Unfortunately, I seemed to have blinked and am now SOL. If you live in a smaller city, you may still have a chance, and of course, there's always Ebay.

Badly Drawn Boy Sketches U.S.

Badly Drawn Boy Sketches U.S. Tour

"There are more adult diapers

"There are more adult diapers sold in the world than children's ones."
— A biz-dev manager reveals a factor behind development of a mini implantable battery which could aid the war on incontinence

The Withered Lover What sign

The Withered Lover


What sign of the Black Zodiac are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

So you think you know

So you think you know all about political satire? You watch The Daily Show, say you read The Onion, and you plan on picking up Dude, Where's My Country? Well, have you tried Jest Mag? It was just listed in the Best of New York 2003 issue of The Village Voice.

I do. One of the

I do. One of the first CD's I ever bought was Shooting Rubberbands at the Stars. Sure, I had some cassettes before her, but they were mostly given to me and mostly sucked. I will never forget when I was in 7th grade, after saving my babysitting money for weeks, walking into the record store and buying the Edie album, an REM album, and an INXS album. I felt like such a "high schooler." Anyway, Edie has gotten a lot of flack over the years and hasn't put out an album in 9 years. Next week all that will change when she releases Volcano on October 14th. You can go here and stream it before it's released.

'Cause tickets from NYC

'Cause tickets from NYC to Amsterdam are hovering around $200 right now! Man, I sure wish I had skipped that wedding about now.

Just kidding Mom

Karma

So, the day before I was supposed to go home to Memphis for my brother's wedding, I went out shopping for a few things. I had to get a wedding present and a new pair of sunglasses, and I had decided to pick up a baseball cap for when my parents woke me up at 8 AM to go to breakfast. I had seen one that I liked at Ground Zero, which has turned into a huge tourist trap ( I live only a couple of blocks away). The one I wanted was a Yankees Cap that was black with black stitching. You know, I wanna root for the Yankees, just subtly.

Anyway, I walked over to Ground Zero and of course, the cap I had seen there was nowhere to be found. I was disappointed and almost bought a different cap, but at the last minute decided against it and hopped on the subway to go uptown for the rest of my shopping.

I spent the whole day scouring the city looking for the perfect gift. By the time I got on the subway to go home, I was exhausted. After a couple of stops a man and two women got on the train and sat down next to me. They were going back and forth about the best way to get to Chinatown. I usually wouldn't have gotten involved, but for some reason I decided to just tell them that they should get off at Canal and walk to Mott. This led to many more questions about Chinatown and I started to regret opening my big mouth. Then we got to the Canal Street stop and I'm like, "This is your stop! Bye!"

They thanked me profusely and even waved to me after they were off the train. I sat back on the seat and went back to staring blankly ahead. When the train was almost to my stop I happened to look down and to my left. They had left one of their bags behind. I felt bad as I picked it up. I probably made them forget it by hurrying them off the train, and I certainly wasn't going to try to track them down in Chinatown. So, I opened it up to see my prize and to my amazement, it was a black yankees cap with black stitching.

Now that's karma!

Madonna's fans, whose idol refused

Madonna's fans, whose idol refused to pose for pictures or sign personalized autographs while promoting her book The English Roses at a Manhattan book store Sept. 29. A select number of fans had to show photo ID before being allowed in, only to get precisely 14 seconds each with the star.

Halle Berry Like Britney Spears before her, the 37-year-old actress had to squash rumors that she and Fred Durst, 33, are more than friends. The Limp Bizkit frontman apparently read WAY too much into their 40-second kiss for the band's new video "Behind Blue Eyes," in which she co-starred.

NAOMI WATTS, 35, and Aussie actor Heath Ledger, 24, have split up. The pair have been apart a lot recently due to work.

Alanis Morissette, 29, who shouted "Thank you, Brazil!" after performing a concert in Peru. Her excuse? Alcohol!

From Yahoo News Doctors told

From Yahoo News

Doctors told Amber Roth she couldn't have kids - so the Cincinnati woman was stunned when she suddenly gave birth while on the toilet.

Roth, who has multiple sclerosis and uses a wheelchair, said, "I heard these gurgling noises."

Her husband, Thomas, said, "I noticed there was something in the toilet. I said, 'Oh, my God! There's a baby in there!' "

The baby boy is doing well.

This is an oldie but

This is an oldie but goodie!

Triumph Interviews Bon Jovi

I bet you didn't see

I bet you didn't see this coming!

My inner child is sixteen years old!

Life's not fair! It's never been fair, but while
adults might just accept that, I know
something's gotta change. And it's gonna
change, just as soon as I become an adult and
get some power of my own.


How Old is Your Inner Child?
brought to you by Quizilla

Oh goody! Another bandwagon to

Oh goody! Another bandwagon to jump on! I can't wait! Check out the new reality series about my life! It's being broadcast on a new format called Imagivision, which is where I write out stuff about my life and what I'm thinking about, and you get to think about it! That's all for now, I'm gonna go design my site...woooohoooo! Here's a picture of me.