Where's My Cane?

This guy is my hero.

I am very confused about the age thing. I feel the same but everyone else seems so young. Except for the guys my age, they seem really old. When I was 21 it was the height of the grunge era. All the girls wore baggy jeans and layers of clothing, it wasn't expected for you to dress like Britney Spears to get a guy to be interested in you. Now, it seems everytime I go out I'm self-conscience around all these skinny little girls with fake boobs. Sure, I know that I can talk circles around them in terms of knowledge and experience, but you have to get someone to want to talk to you first.

What A Girl Wants

Survey of the Sexes

My Answers:

How long should a guy wait to fart in front of you?

Never is preferred - I lived with a guy once and I acted like it was cool (as in acceptable) - but then if I was ever already mad at him about something, that would send me over the top.

Why do you go out with such jerks?

Its fun to date someone who hates everyone else but likes you. It makes you feel special. It just sucks when they start treating you like shit too, and they eventually will.

How macho do you want us?

I like it when guys are protective of me, but don't tell me what to do.

Why does it bother you if a guy is a slob at home?

Because I'm a slob too and somebody's gotta pick up around here.

Does it bother you when we check out other women?

Absolutely. It's rude. Don't tell me you can't help it cause that's just stupid.

What’s the best way for a guy to impress you?

Take me somewhere I've never been or tell me something I don't already know.

After one date, if a guy isn’t into you, how should he cut it off?

Just tell me, it will make it a lot easier to just be your friend. It's hard to respect someone who can't just be honest.

Whoa Nelly!

It's been a huge day over at my other little site. I got linked this morning on Fluxblog and Stereogum. I've already gotten over 1000 hits and 36 emails so far from people who dig the site, and unlike this page, no hate mail! Yay!

I also got a couple of requests to syndicate and as soon as I had done all of the research and set it all up, the site that hosts the syndication feed goes kaput! Yay!

Anyway, maybe all this publicity could lead to a gig writing for a website - like say the Best Week Ever Blog? or Memphist?

People always say find something that you're good at and the money will follow, but I keep looking behind me and all I see is too much ass.

Imitation Is The Sincerest Form Of Flattery

First came http://www.johnkerryisadouchebagbutimvotingforhimanyway.com/

Now there's http://georgewbushisadouchebagandihopeherotsinhell.com/

Carry On.

Quote of the Day

"Success is going from failure to failure without loss of enthusiasm. " - Winston Churchill

Extraordinary Machine

The leaked track from Fiona Apple's new album is up at Scenestars.

You're Welcome.

Friendster vs. MySpace

I have both a Friendster and MySpace account. When I originally signed up on Friendster it was pretty cool, but the newness and excitement soon wore off as I befriended all of my previous friends and then felt awkward about trolling online for new friends. Then when MySpace started up, I made an account and soon was once again enthralled because of MySpace's vast superiority to Friendster (C'mon, Friendster has been in beta for over a year! MySpace actually works all the time and continues to update and add new features consistantly and they throw pretty cool parties from time to time.)

Anyway, I went straight to Friendster and sent out an all points bulletin for my peeps to convert. But alas, no one budged. And once again, I lost interest.

In my Friendster friend list, I am actually physically friends with all but three people, meaning I know them in person. My Myspace friends list is a totally different beast. It's a cool site, but I only know one person for real over there. People just keep sending me invites and I keep accepting. It kind of takes away from the whole validity of the thing I guess.

The thing is, Friendster is like your cool hipster friend that wants you to come hangout and play Atari 2600 and listen to Sonic Youth, even though they both suck. MySpace is the friend that you don't admit to hanging out with, but he's got that awesome new Xbox game and won't look at you sideways when you pull out your Maroon 5 CD.

(Ed. Note: Yes, I do own a Maroon 5 CD, but its the Japanese release and I got it in Tokyo before it was released here, so i'm still cool right?)

Sedaris On Tour

Via: Gawker

Our man in Atlanta says that Sedaris is still keepin' it real with his North Carolina roots. At yesterday afternoon's reading and Q&A down south, Sedaris let all the smokers come to the front of the line -- "Real smokers, pack a day or more people," not the stupid cigarette-stealing social smokers. We salute Mr. Sedaris's commitment to health and glamor.

Best of all, the first audience question was: "Why do you think there are so many funny gay people?" To which Sedaris answered, "Just so everyone heard that question, she asked me, 'is there a relationship between me putting a penis in my mouth and being witty at a dinner party?' You know, I hadn't really thought about it." Really? We had.

Deep Thoughts

When I first moved to Memphis, I was a text messaging queen. I don't know why, but there was just something about being able to send info to people and not having to talk to them that I really really liked. I would go out with one group of friends and have a conversation while having a completely different conversation with someone else in a different part of the city. I am so easily amused. Anyway, after a few months, the excitement wore off and it just became easier to dial the number, say what I wanted to say and hang up. I figured txting someone was just a new fangled fad that eventually would fall to the wayside like the pet rock. After reading this, I'm not so sure. We are now raising kids that grew up on txting, especially with the popularity of IM. So, to them it's not a fad, it's a way of life.

Cartoons Are Better With Cereal

Josh ended up coming over last night and we finally watched Aqua Teen Hunger Force. A lot of my friends have been raving about this show for a while, and I have to admit at first glance, I was a little confused. With characters named Master Shake, Frylock and Meatwad, the whole thing seems like an inside joke for a bunch of stoners. I really didn't get what the hell was going on, but then I checked the website and was informed:

If you have to ask what Aqua Teen Hunger Force is all about, it is probably not a show for you.

I definitely think it's for people on a different wavelength. If you know what I mean, hardy har har...

Falling Down and Keeping Your Hands To Yourself

I went to Punk Rock Pilates tonight after missing both classes last week. Man, my ass is sore. But, I'm getting a lot better, even with the time off. Stevan finally made it back to class after being out for the past 4 weeks due to breaking his wrist after falling off a bar stool. That is so righteous. If I ever break anything, I hope its because I fell off a bar stool. Hopefully we'll get to go out again soon and paint the town in high style.

I am relaxing at home tonight watching the HBO special Celibacy. The shit is crazy! It's all about all these rituals that people go through to beat down their sexual desires. It's totally freaky. People are doing weird genital manipulation, being crucified and are basically being beat down. I understand that the people involved are doing it because of some sort of religious affiliation - but what about just masturbating? Jeez!

Nobody Died When Clinton Lied

Get this, supposedly Bill Clinton has a blog to coincide with his book tour. Tons of people are commenting on it and I think they believe it's legit. I think it's a total fake. He talks about waking up and scratching his ass, and Kevin Spacey's new boyfriend and he calls every celebrity he knows his best friend. Clinton may be a lot of things, but he's way smarter than whoever is writing this thing. They're following his tour schedule closely so that they can say, "oh I'm gonna be here" or "this is what I did yesterday." but I still think its fake.

Not That There's Anything Wrong With That

Word on the street is that Miss Britney is engaged because she's got a bun in the oven.

Interesting.

Not Too Much Time On My Hands

So, not a lot of blogging going on this weekend. I had a really great weekend, but I won't bore you with all the gory details. I was supposed to go to Brother Juniper's for breakfast this morning, I had been looking forward to it since I have never been there and I saw them on an episode of Rachael Ray's $40 A Day. Anyway, I didn't quite make it.

I did get to go see Brad Troxel's show down on S. Main this weekend. His paintings are so gorgeous, I want to buy them all.

I also saw Farenheit 9/11, but I want some more time to think about it before I write a review of any sort. My feelings are still a little blurry about what I thought about it.

Anyway, back to normal posting tomorrow. See ya then...

SUNDAY MEME

List five phrases that will guarantee you will get twice the number of normal page hits tomorrow:

1. Britney Pregnant
2. Bill Clinton Blog
3. Wassef Ali Hassoun
4. DMX Arrested
5. Mermaid Parade

Reader Participation

Please recommend to me one of the following:

1. a movie
2. a book
3. a musical artist, song, or album
4. a website
5. a tv show

Thank You

A Single Mistake

Forbes released a Special Report today on the best cities to be single. I guess I better start packing my bags.

The report also includes some interesting articles on:

Top Destinations For Singles
Single travelers looking for wild nightlife, good restaurants and a bit of culture should head to cities like Austin, Boston and Denver.

The Best Cars For Singles
If you can afford it, when you're single you can drive any car you want.

Best Rental Markets For Singles
It's tough for singles to find decent housing after college. Here are ten rental markets where the job prospects are decent and apartments are affordable.

Quote of the Day

Ever notice that "what the hell?" is always the right decision? -- Marilyn Monroe

Will Work For Food

Well, I guess I am officially looking for another job. I have been a freelancer at Channel 5 for over 8 months now, and although my boss, Peggy, has been working to get my position made permanent, I'm starting to think that's not gonna happen. I know she feels terrible about it, but I guess those are the tough situations you have to deal with when you're the big boss. Anyway, they've cut my hours back at work the past couple of weeks and today I went in and was told that due to budget constraints and low staffing levels (there was no photog for me to work with), they didn't need me to work today. I felt like I was being fired.

Anyway, all I've ever done is work in television and films (oh, and and restaurants) and there's not a huge number of jobs in those industries here, so I'm not exactly sure what I will do. Maybe it's time to go to LA.

Anyway, if you hear of anything - I'm open to any and all opportunities, shoot me an email.

Melancholy and the Infinite Thursday

Well, we tried to go out and party down tonight, but things just never really took off. I drug the white boy crew down to Isaac Hayes to hear Jason spin, and even though we had the prime seats in the VIP area - we couldn't get a waitress to look at us twice. There were some peeps from Q107 there that tried to get the boys to follow them to Sleep Out Louie's, and even though I think that they were considering it, they decided to stick it out with me until I agreed to roll to Brookhaven Pub for fun time with the khaki crowd. I keed, I keed. It was fun, we made the best of it. It's always a little nerve racking when you know you have to be at work in the morning and so you know there's no reason to get crazy, just to have to pay for it the next day, so at midnight we called it and made our way home.

And tomorrow night's another night.

Thursday Night Fever

Hey kids - guess what? It's gonna rain, so screw the Peabody and the Madison rooftop parties, they are ultra-lame anyway with the kids home for the summer(by the way, I'll be there next week ;) and stay dry at Isaac Hayes Club while listening to the musical stylings of DJ Witness.

Quote of the Day

"I am an excitable person who only understands life lyrically, musically, in whom feelings are much stronger as reason. I am so thirsty for the marvelous that only the marvelous has power over me. Anything I can not transform into something marvelous, I let go. Reality doesn't impress me. I only believe in intoxication, in ecstasy, and when ordinary life shackles me, I escape, one way or another. No more walls." - Anais Nin, The House of Incest

Shameless Self Promotion

You can stream the new unreleased Cure album and check out the new design over at Scenestars. I have plans to go to the Curiosa Festival in Nashville which will include performaces by:

THE CURE
INTERPOL
THE RAPTURE
MOGWAI

and on the second stage
THURSDAY
MUSE
CURSIVE
MELISSA AUF DER MAUR
COOPER TEMPLE CLAUSE
HEAD AUTOMATICA

Carry On.

Quote of the Day

There are as many nights as days, and the one is just as long as the other in the year's course.

Even a happy life cannot be without a measure of darkness, and the word 'happy' would lose its meaning if it were not balanced by sadness.

-Carl Jung

I want a range life, if I could settle down
If I could settle down, then I would settle down.

-Pavement's "Range Life"

Deep Thoughts

Do people actually watch The Simple Life? It's probably really funny to watch a retard try to tie her shoes too, but it's really not nice to laugh at it.

I totally got linked on one of my absolute favorite sites yesterday! Kiss me, I'm famous!

Method Man says his new show is not ghetto enough.

"I'm trying to keep this show ghetto, and there's a way for it to be both ghetto and intelligent. But it's not going that way."

Uh, Meth, here's a tip, you might not want to make the ghetto seem like so much fun, it could come back to bite ya in the azz.

Lollapalozza Canceled! Did it never occur to organizers that people that like Morrissey don't like sunlight? And they certainly wouldn't want to spend the whole day around - gasp! other people.

Just Sayin'

A career CIA officer claims in a new book that America is losing the war on terror, in part because of the invasion of Iraq, which, he says distracted the United States from the war against terrorism and further fueled al-Qaida’s struggle against the United States. The author, who writes as “Anonymous” is a 22-year veteran of the CIA and still works for the intelligence agency, which allowed him to publish the book after reviewing it for classified information.

In an interview with NBC’s Chief Foreign Affairs Correspondent Andrea Mitchell, he calls the U.S. war in Iraq a dream come true for Osama bin Laden, saying “bin Laden saw the invasion of Iraq as a Christmas gift he never thought he’d get.” By invading a country that’s regarded as the second holiest place in Islam, he asserts, the Bush administration inadvertently validated bin Laden’s assertions that the United States intends a holy war against Muslims.

Read the rest here.

Bonus Points: Make sure when you read Anonymous' answers you channel Ned's voice from Southpark.

The Top 100 Grossing Movies

(-with ones I've seen in boldface.)

1. Titanic
2. Star Wars
3. E.T. the Extra-Terrestrial
4. Star Wars: Episode I - The Phantom Menace
5. Spider-Man
6. Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King
7. Passion of the Christ
8. Jurassic Park
9. Shrek 2
10. Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers

11. Finding Nemo
12. Forrest Gump
13. Lion King, The
14. Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone
15. Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring
16. Star Wars: Episode II - Attack of the Clones
17. Star Wars: Episode VI - Return of the Jedi
18. Independence Day
19. Pirates of the Caribbean
20. Sixth Sense, The (1999)
21. Star Wars: Episode V - The Empire Strikes Back
22. Home Alone
23. Matrix Reloaded, The
24. Shrek
25. Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets
26. How the Grinch Stole Christmas
27. Jaws
28. Monsters, Inc.
29. Batman
30. Men in Black
31. Toy Story 2
32. Bruce Almighty
33. Raiders of the Lost Ark
34. Twister
35. My Big Fat Greek Wedding
36. Ghost Busters
37. Beverly Hills Cop
38. Cast Away
39. Lost World: Jurassic Park, The
40. Signs
41. Rush Hour 2
42. Mrs. Doubtfire
43. Ghost (1990)
44. Aladdin
45. Saving Private Ryan
46. Mission: Impossible II
47. X2
48. Austin Powers in Goldmember
49. Back to the Future
50. Austin Powers: The Spy Who Shagged Me
51. Terminator 2: Judgment Day
52. Exorcist, The
53. Mummy Returns, The
54. Armageddon
55. Gone with the Wind
56. Pearl Harbor
57. Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade
58. Toy Story (1995)
59. Men in Black II
60. Gladiator
61. Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs
62. Dances with Wolves
63. Batman Forever
64. Fugitive, The
65. Ocean's Eleven
66. What Women Want
67. Perfect Storm, The
68. Liar Liar
69. Grease
70. Jurassic Park III
71. Mission: Impossible
72. Planet of the Apes
73. Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom
74. Pretty Woman
75. Tootsie
76. Top Gun
77. There's Something About Mary
78. Ice Age
79. Crocodile Dundee
80. Home Alone 2: Lost in New York
81. Elf
82. Air Force One
83. Rain Man
84. Apollo 13
85. Matrix, The
86. Beauty and the Beast
87. Tarzan (1999)
88. Beautiful Mind, A
89. Chicago
90. Three Men and a Baby
91. Meet the Parents
92. Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves
93. Hannibal
94. Catch Me If You Can
95. Big Daddy
96. Sound of Music, The
97. Batman Returns
98. Bug's Life, A
99. Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban
100. Waterboy, The

My Reputation Preceeds Me

Last weekend at Melange I sat down at a table of a boisterous crowd whom were with my friend Nathan. That night I was reminded of the two drink rule, which is:

After two drinks, two things should never be discussed: Religion or Politics.

One of our lovely female companions was quite unaware of this rule, and although I thought that I had triumphantly adhered to it, I was notified today that that might not have been the case.

Sitting to the left of me that night was a fine young gentleman by the name of Scott. Scott was visiting Memphis from Orlando. Here is the email Scott sent to Nathan upon his return to Orlando:

I was at Lesleigh's house last night visiting with her and her parents. Her mother asked me about my weekend in Memphis. I was telling them about being at Mélange and who all was there. I started talking about Rachel...no physical description or name....just the conversation we were having. Lesleigh chimes in, "That sounds like Rachel." I said, "Yes, her name was Rachel." Her reply, "HA! That's my cousin."

As they would say at Disney, "It's a small world after all."

Big Plans

Patrik's first submission is up at Scenestars! We are both very excited about this project! We even got a reader submission today. Daniel is having some pc issues that I fear may have to be corrected before he can join in on the fun. There are a couple of other contributors that hopefully will be set up by the end of the weekend. I love it when a plan comes together!

Can We Just Pretend Like That Never Happened?

I had a terrible day. It started off fine, I went downtown to pick up some documents for a story, then my photog had a very minor fender bender. It was a tap really, but of course, the police had to be called and tickets had to be written, and then I had to drive him back to the station and our story got cancelled. Then I had the fabulous luck of sending out a personal email to a colleague and accidentally sending it to all of the other producers. DOH! Later in the afternoon I went downtown to federal court to cover the Clyde Wade trial and I forgot to turn my cell off, so of course, it rang right in the middle of closing arguments. Talk about wanting to disappear.

Oh well, tomorrow's another day where I'll have plenty more opprotunities to humilate myself. Wish me luck!

Bring It On

There's another Memphis Media critic on the blog block. So far he seems to have his sites set on taking shots at the CA and other print media, but I'm sure he will get around to the local news stations soon enough. Everyone does. Even my own mother. Now that Mike finally has some direct competition, it'll be interesting to see what happens next.

Coming Out Party

I have a new blog. It's an MP3 blog that reviews songs and let's you sample them. It's going to be a team blog, I have three other bloggers I am working to get set up to post. We all like different tunes, so it will be a diverse group.

Check it out and tell me what you think.

Scenestars

Watching With One Eye Open

Is it just me, or does anyone else get that super creepy feeling every time you watch Six Feet Under. I literally almost couldn't hoss down my Krystal's last night while watching that show. It's one excrutiating scene after another. But, I guess that's why I love it so much. Awkward moments are my specialty.

Can't wait till Claire gets all lesbo next week.

This Looks Like A Job For USA Today

18 mosiquito bites. That is what I am suffering through today after sitting on the patio at Cafe Ole last night. Ben, Eric, Daniel and I sat around and discussed what to do if you wake up one morning to find a guy on your couch, pants down around his ankles, newpaper on the floor next to the couch, pile of human poo poo on the paper.

What? You have the sense to get up and find a paper, but you couldn't make it to the toilet? The offended chose to give the guy a ride home and never mention the situation again. Yeah, right.

The moment of the night came when the waitress came by and announced last call. Ben asked for a "beautiful blond with big tits and an ass that tastes like french vanilla ice cream."

Of course, unfortunately, it wasn't white boy day, so he was SOL.

Bonus Points to anyone who knows where that line comes from.

This Is How You Remind Me

OK - So here's an interesting post about The Sucking That Is Known As Nickleback.

But here's the sweet deal for any Nickleback fans out there that may read this:

The first person to send me a gmail account invite will get a brand new unopened copy of Nickleback - The Long Road courtesy of BMG (damn those monthly selections!) I probably won't use it but those gmail thingys are like legal tender in cyberspace! Anyway, email me and make sure you send me your address! Postage on me!

EDIT: Well, that didn't take long. The CD will be in the mail tomorrow. (Winner's name withheld to protect them from sheer embarressment.)

I decided to use the gmail account for another blog I am working on. More on that to come.

Quote of the Day

"One sees clearly only with the heart. Anything essential is invisible to the eyes." ~ Antoine de Saint-Exupery

Sunday MEME

List five phrases that will guarantee you will get twice the number of normal page hits tomorrow:

1. Dave Chapelle Attacks Crowd
2. Brad Pitt Naked
3. Famous Homosexuals
4. Madonna Crazy
5. South Korean Hostage

Shameless Self Promotion

If you wanted to, you could go here and nominate my blog for a design award. This is in no way an immodest request, cause Patrik did most of the work in designing my site, so he would get all the credit.

Thanks!

Oh What A Night!

“The time has come,” the Walrus said,
“To talk of many things:
Of shoes—and ships—and sealing wax—
Of cabbages—and kings—
And why the sea is boiling hot—
And whether pigs have wings.”

--Lewis Carroll, Alice in Wonderland

And that about sums up the night I had last night. Many weird yet interesting conversations. I started out with Ben at The Blue Monkey to hear his friend Carlos play. Pretty good band, very bluesy. I was gonna post a link but I forgot his last name. Anyway, I left the Monkey and made a quick stop at Ernestine and Hazel's to visit the mysterious whiskey bar that I had never heard of before. I got out of my car and hit a time warp. The kids really are home for summer. I made my way through the sea of uniforms from Abercrappie to the upstairs only to be sadly disappointed. The people I was supposed to be meeting weren't there and it reminded me of being at a kegger at someone's house whose parents were out of town for the weekend.

So, I headed to Melange to meet up with some folks and along the way ran into some kind of midnight bike ride. There were about 1000 people riding their bikes up Peabody, with cops everywhere and people standing on the side of the street cheering them on. I got caught between two groups of riders and felt like I was in a parade.

When I got to Melange I ran into Steve and Brandon and caught up and talked crazy and became sentimental. When Mark came by I ended up tagging along to a party a girl who works at the Deli was having. We rolled up around 2:30 in the AM and it was in full swing. Cool DJ, hipster hairdos, punk rawk girls, guys in bands - every base had been covered - except a bathroom. Big sign on the door telling us to go squat on the side of the house. They even put toilet paper out on the porch for us. I thought I was way past peeing in the bushes, but that's Memphis for ya. Gotta Love It!

Quote of the Day

"Love is not self-sacrifice, but the most profound assertion of your own needs and values. It is for your own happiness that you need the person you love, and that is the greatest compliment, the greatest tribute you can pay to any person." ~Ayn Rand

Snarky Is As Snarky Does

So, a couple of years ago I was casting this show about the best haircuts in NYC for under $100 bucks and I had to find three girls with similar hair to go to three different places and get their haircut. Well, I casted the only three girls that showed up at another shoot I was doing the day before. The next morning when we were supposed to start shooting the episode, this one lame-ass didn't show up. The director I was working for at the time was 7 months pregnant and Cah-razy and flipped out all over me. I was pretty much about to lose my job, but I asked one of the other hair models to please call all of her friends and beg them to come down to the shoot. So, a friend of Jessica Delfino's came down, Chelsea Peretti. She, just like Jessica, was/is a stand-up comic/writer type. So, of course, at the time she was out of work and had plenty of time to come down and get a free haircut. Anyway, we ended up at this party together one night and I went to see her do stand-up a couple of times, and I always thought she was hilarious. I think she pretty much hated me though. Anyway, she has a blog now, she's the brains behind The Rejection Line, helped design the great Black People Love Us, and she's had one of her jokes animated on Shorties Watchin Shorties and if you want you should check her out.

Carry on.

Spare Time, Wasted Time

When I'm bored and could be doing laundry, alphabetizing my CD's or watching The Fabulous Life Of..., what I am usually doing is playing Ghetto or Fabulous or poking around on Eric Conveys an Emotion.

Yeah, I could be doing something productive with my time like reading a book or finally learning After Effects, but I guess it's my life to waste.

Just Ignore Me

This is my 1000th post, so let's get personal:

I'm full of overt gestures. It scares people. I know I make them feel uncomfortable sometimes. But I have a hard time hiding my emotions or feelings. My friends know that if there is any issue that pops up between us, they're gonna get the "We have to talk" call.

I'm too intense sometimes. I have a hard time waiting for things to happen, I have this drive to make them happen. I tell people what I think. I care too much. I have the type of personality that can overwhelm people. I like to confront people, even when I'm the person who screwed up. I don't want to run from problems, I want to conquer them. The problem with being that way is that most people I know are very passive aggressive and they don't want to talk about things, they just want to let them simmer and take their anger out on you because you won't just be mad at them back. It's all very childish. I just won't do it. I refuse to hold grudges or talk bad about people behind their back. If I cared for you once, I'll always care for you, even if we have issues to deal with. I don't understand the concept of acting like you just don't care. People that don't care aren't brave, they're scared. You certainly can't be judged if you don't care. You certainly can't fail at anything if you weren't trying for anything in the first place. I fail all the time, but I keep getting up, dusting myself off and jumpin back on the horse.

BTW, I also tend to go on tangents...

Blogger's Bash

I started last night off at The Blue Monkey mid-town to meet up with some of my fellow Memphis Area Bloggers. The topics of discussion ran from politics and health care to Pornography era Cure versus Kiss Me, Kiss Me, Kiss Me era Cure. It was fun. I can't wait to do it again.

Edit: Actually, Mike over at Half-Bakered has a much more in-depth review of the night and he said I was cute, so go over there and check it out.

The night ended at The Blue Monkey Downtown with shots being drank in honor of Mark's 27th year on the planet. You can come by Stop 345 and wish him a Happy Birthday in person tonight.

Instruments Are So Over

Big news on the music tip. Bjork's highly anticipated Medulla is set for an end of summer release. I can't wait to hear it! Although I'm a little leary that it will be an all a capella album. Don't get me wrong, Bjork has one of the most beautiful and alluring voices I have ever heard, but her music has always been the icing on the cake. Her rhythms take you to another world. And I'm not being all hokey, it's just truly original AND good, two things that don't always mix well.

24 Hour Party People

I hit the Hi-Tone last night for Myrlin's birthday party. I ended up running into my old roommate Stuart McMillan and got invited to a party he's throwing over July 4th weekend. The wild thing is that it's called Old School Reunion 2004, and if when I go that's exactly what it will be. I'm really looking forward to it! It's also a voter registration drive which almost brings a tear to my eye. We're all growed up now. Pass it on!

Oh, and Mark is back from Bonnaroo. He's got some choice moments on The Memphis Scene Blog. I can't wait to hear all about his trip tonight at the Memphis Blogger's Bash at The Blue Monkey.

Oh, and if you're looking to do something Thursday night, come by Stop 345. Sons of Soil will be playing and Mark and Jaydred will be spinning. I'll be there, I just hope they have limes this time.

Real Friendship

My friend sent me this, and now I want to share it with you...

Are you tired of all those sissy "friendship" poems that always sound good, but never actually come close to reality? Well, here is a series of promises that really speak to true friendship:

1 When you are sad - I will help get you drunk and plot revenge against the sorry bastard who made you sad.
2. When you are blue - I will try to dislodge whatever is choking you.
3. When you smile - I will know you finally got laid.
4. When you are scared - I will rag on you about it every chance I get.
5. When you are worried - I will tell you horrible stories about how much worse it could be and to quit whining.
6. When you are confused - I will use little words.
7. When you are sick - Stay the hell away from me until you are well again. I don't want whatever you have.
8. When you fall - I will point and laugh at your clumsy ass.

This is my oath...I pledge it till the end. Why? You may ask. Because you are my friend.

Send this to 10 of your closest friends, then get depressed because you can only think of two and one of them isn't speaking to you right now anyway.

Remember: A good friend will help you move. A really good friend will help you move a body.

Let me know if I ever need to bring a shovel.

Sex and the City Reborn

For all of the poor souls out there that don't have HBO and have been regulated to a life of reality programming, here's your chance to see what the hell all these people have been talking about for all these years. Sex and the City begins running in syndication on TBS tonight. The reason I enjoyed the show so much was because it debuted the summer I moved to New York, and even if I couldn't live the glamorous life the girls did due to financial constraints, I could still live vicariously through them. I was 25 and had the world at my feet. It was fabulous.

BTW, rumors of a SATC movie have been officially quashed. Oh, well. We'll always have Paris.

Some Call Me Crazy, Some Call Me All Night Long

I went to see Prince last night. It was incredible. He's the only musician who can tell everyone he's a badass and instead of reacting to it with incredulity, you think, "Yes, You Is!" People throw around the term genius way too much, but he is definitely my definition.

"Nobody Can Mess with My Band!"

It didn't hurt at all that the band did kick ass. I mean Maceo Parker? Come on! I don't think a lot of the people at the Pyramid even understood what they were witnessing. Parker's tribute to Ray Charles was a special treat. They kicked out the jams.

"This Is Music By Musicians!"

And it was the best sober concert I've ever seen.

P.S. Worst. Name. Ever.

What's The Catch?

Well, it looks like Yahoo jumped into the email wars today with their new look and amenities. I opened my email this morning to a new and improved Yahoo Mail.

Yahoo! Mail delivers for you.
Streamlined interface
100MB of storage
10MB message size,
including attachments
Same price – free!

It's a new concept to me for a service to improve itself and not ask me to do anything in return. It's every girlfriend's secret fantasy! UPGRADE!

Just Sayin'

More new songs on Ryan Adams' Website.

Carry On.

Anonymous Men Need Not Apply

Can I just tell you how much I am in love with the latest version of Yahoo Messenger? I realize this makes me the biggest dweeb on the planet, but I just love it. I really dig My Launch Radio Station that only plays music I like, it's like having my very own personal greatest hits of my life soundtrack. And the new audibles are fun too.

The only downside is when you get unsolicited IM's. I'm all for meeting new people, but mostly it's guys that want to talk dirty to you. Anonymous guys with no profile. Every once in a while some guy will pop up and say something pretty interesting, but the chat will eventually turn to sex. It's just silly. If I wanted to sleep with a stranger I would go to a bar, walk up to a man and say "let's go." Simple as pie. I don't need to sit around and play footsies over the internet.

All The News You Didn't Need To Know

Nicole Kidman Gets It On With 10-Year-Old

Memphis Not The Only City With Daycare Problems

Remember The Old Tack In Chair Prank?

Enough Reagan, What About This!

Whiskey Is The New Vodka

Why Women Fake Orgasms

Merriam-Webster's 2004 Top Ten Favorite Words

1. defenestration
2. serendipity
3. onomatopoeia
4. discombobulate
5. plethora
6. callipygian
7. juxtapose
8. persnickety
9. kerfuffle
10. flibbertigibbet

View Other Favorite Words

You Know You Wanna See It

Quote of the Day

"How happy is the blameless vestal's lot!
The world forgetting, by the world forgot.
Eternal sunshine of the spotless mind!
Each pray'r accepted, and each wish resign'd." - Alexander Pope

Best Review of Sunshine of the Spotless Mind Ever.

Sake To Me

I started last night off by going to see Saved! and I have to say, I swear to God, it was really hilarious. I can only pray that all of the Memphis area churches will rent out 9 million seats and invite everyone from their congregation to see it like they did with The Passion of the Christ.

Bonus: I finally got to see the trailer for Napoleon Dynamite which I can't wait to see. I'm going to the preview at Studio on the Square on July 8th, and I have an extra ticket for some lucky little buddy!

After the movie, we went to Stereo Sushi at Sekisui Pacific Rim and drank Hot Sake and talked shit. It's a cool set-up, all neon and waterfalls, and there's a DJ after 10. I've heard the place can get pretty bumpin, but there wasn't a lot going on before midnight, so we headed to Mid-town for a quick drink at the Bayou before ending up at Sidestreet.

That's when things get kind of fuzzy. And that's all I have to say about that.

Carry On.

Overextended

I volunteered at the Gibson 5K tonight. If you ran in it, I was the girl holding the first arrow and the last. And yes I realize you probably didn't need the arrow, but that's what I was asked to do and who am I to argue? Anyway, seeing all those runners really inspired me - to grab a drink and smoke a cigarette as soon as it was over! I keed, I keed. But seriously, the look on some those guys faces when I asked them for a light as they were passing by - hilarious.

I actually think that my job of standing in one place for an hour and a half was just as strenuous as the runners. It takes stamina to stay in one place for that long. I got stander's cramp. The cool part about the whole thing was how there were runners from every ethnic backgroud, every age, men, women, kids, people running with strollers, kids on scooters. It kind of makes you have a I'd like to teach the world to sing moment.

Alrighty, I'm off to soothe my aching feet with a nice cool beverage. Cheers!

Don't Believe Tha Hype

Original Gmail

Ok, people. What the dealio with the new gmail accounts? I mean, I get that they have a lot of storage space and I guess there is some kind of market out there for people who freak out if they have to delete an email, but whats the big deal?

Their marketing strategy is to not let people sign up for accounts but instead, you have to be invited or do something good or some crap. So, now it's some kind of status symbol to have a particular email account? People are even ponying up quite a chunk of change on Ebay for the honor of getting their handle before the service is opened to all the common folk. What am I missing? Are there that many people out there that either don't already have an email account or ones that actually want to go to the trouble of changing over and sending out that annoying email that says, "New Email Address!"

I used to obediently update my address book, then I decided to just leave the email in my inbox for a couple of weeks until I finally realized I was never gonna email that person anyway.

Cringe Worthy

So Defamer kind of trashed my new best fake friend Jane. Of course, he also provided a link which made everything work out in the end. No publicity is bad publicity right?

Of course, re-reading the show described as "what 20-somethings really say, think, and do. An uncompromising yet riotously irreverent look at five flawed friends who will go to just about any length to find love, happiness, or - at the very least - a promising hook up" makes me so glad I am no longer in my twenties. The words hook-up have come out of my mouth about as many times as the words, "I sure do love the new Nickleback album."

TV Flaccidity

The MTV Movie Awards will be airing tonight but with all the buzz this week about Eminem's derriere, Adam Sandler's acceptance speech where he thanks the people who supplied him with weed, and all of the winners having already been leaked - what's the point of watching?

All the best clips will be on Best Week Ever Saturday morning anyway.

Don't It Make You Feel Dirty?

I've mentioned my spam problem before. Everyday I open my email account and have to sort through all the emails for penis enlargement, how to buy pills online and the latest one, how to become an internet super sleuth and get revenge on all your enemies. Now, although all of these things are surely worthwhile ventures, today I recieved an opportunity that might be the weirdest email pitch to have me buy something that I have encountered yet, but also may be the most useful.

Check it out - but not right before lunch:

Let me ask you this...which is worse:

pel78@post.cz?subject=MoreInfo

Where Have all the Rocker Boys Gone?

Long night. I went to dinner with Jax at Bosco's and had one to many and talked his ear off. Sorry! I was supposed to meet up with a co-worker at the Hi-Tone around 10 for some album release party, but he bailed and so we drove by Young Ave Deli, only to learn that Yo La Tengo was playing. How am I so out of the loop? I've been missing out on a lot of cool stuff around here because I don't seem to be hanging out with anyone in the know (no offense my peeps). Lucero played last Sunday night and across the street there was a happenin' party at Melange. What am I supposed to do, keep up with this stuff myself? pfff.

My problem is since I've been back in Mempho, I've been hangin' out with the drinkers when what I need to be doin' is hangin' out with the rockers.

Hippies Unite!

If anyone's been wondering what all those crazy Phish fans are gonna do with themselves now that the band has officially broken up, look no further.

I'm just kidding, we all know that they've still got Dave Matthews, they'll be fine.

Afternoon Delight

The new music video for Afternoon Delight from the forthcoming feature Anchorman is up at MTV.Com. I've never been a huge Will Ferrell fan, but I can't wait to see this film.

Music Madness

Rumor has it that half the bands with recording contracts under the Warner Brother's umbrella will be looking for a new place to call home soon. An article on Pitchforkmedia says my beloved Stereolab has already gotten the axe. Stereolab people! A music staple if there ever was one.

"The tipping point of whether an artist remains is the company's passion to market and promote them. Everyone that remains we're going to be insanely passionate about." Which we must take to mean that you can expect to see more of The Darkness than you ever dreamed, and possibly a whole lot less of Built to Spill-- the justice, of course, being that these bands will likely make more money on indies anyway.

As the cuts slowly leak out, here's a partial selection of the massive artist roster that, as members of the rather extended Warner family, could potentially find themselves homeless: Green Day, The Stratford 4, Dream Theater, Depeche Mode, New Order, Jewel, Morcheeba, Deftones, Built to Spill, The Donnas, Barenaked Ladies, Junior Senior, The Stills, Mandy Moore. Mandy Moore, people! That girl won't survive on the street!

Save Yourself

I was informed tonight about another great Christian parody site:

http://www.landoverbaptist.org/

Don't miss these insightful stories:

Harry Potter is Driving Children Insane!

Are Our Troops Doing Enough to Torture Unsaved Iraqis?

Good Gracious, I Have Seen It All

Right now on Ebay, if you hurry, you can be the proud owner of two delightful cookbooks entitled:

Cooking with Semen
Written by JayLynn. This is a spiral bound softcover book with real recipes. Most of the recipes call for a tablespoon of semen. Interspersed through the recipes are historical and informational anecdotes

Cooking in the Nude
Written and illustrated by Debbie and Stephen Cornwell. Softcover with 63 pages. Another book of recipes with sections like "Greens with Envy" and "Don't Stop Now"

Better Late Then Never

If you followed the Washingtonienne Sex Scandal via Wonkette but never got a chance to see the actual blog, here's a replica.

The office of straight-laced Ohio Sen. Mike DeWine (R) became the epicenter of salacious Capitol Hill gossip when it surfaced that an entry-level DeWine staffer apparently had been chronicling her steamy sex life on an Internet weblog," the Cleveland Plain Dealer reports.

Washingtonienne was full of ribald and hilarious comments about life on Capitol Hill before it was cut off. In complaining about her low salary, and her wonderment at how other junior staffers could get by on such a pittance without resorting to less savory means to supplement their incomes, Washingtonienne wrote: "I am convinced that Congressional offices are full of dealers and hos."

BTW, guess who bought the washingtonienne.com domain name?

Tuesday is Choose Day

Would you rather:
1. wear the same underwear for a week OR not bathe for a week?

Wear the same underwear for a week - where does it say you can't wash them each night?
2. eat a plate full of boiled earthworms, covered in gravy OR fried bird feet with a tangy teriyaki glaze?

I'm from the south, so I'm definitely a gravy girl
3. drop your wallet and keys in a thick patch of cacti and have to dig in to find them OR play dodgeball naked?

Naked Dodgeball, baby!
4. get caught spitting in your boss' coffee OR mooning your neighbor?

My boss reads this blog so, mooning my neighbor of course!

Living Vicariously

I got a shout-out today from a ficticious sit-com character. And she's a sassy one! I was very surprised at the content of her blog. It's definitely not sanitized. Lucky for her, she doesn't have a "real" mother that might come across it and have a heart attack like me. Anyway, the show the site is promoting is called Good Girls Don't and, as far as I can tell, it's kind of a Sex and the City for twenty-somethings in L.A. Here's their pitch:

From the creators of That '70s Show, this subversive series busts TV taboos by showing what 20-somethings really say, think, and do. An uncompromising yet riotously irreverent look at five flawed friends who will go to just about any length to find love, happiness, or - at the very least - a promising hook up, Good Girls Don't. is the comedy your mother warned you about.

Worth a look...

Ha Ha Hoax

New ideas are being thrown around about the identity of Rance, the anonymous celebrity blogger that wants everyone to believe he's a high-powered actor letting us in on all the juicy gossip in H-town. I told Nathan the other evening that I was sure it was Jim Carrey. I don't know why, it just seemed like a good fit. However, via Half-Bakered, there is a new theory on the forefront that it's being written by someone in the loop in Hollywood but not necessarily, an A-lister. We'll see.

Coming Clean

Sean sent me a link tonight about a little blurb that was written about me on Bloggerforum.com. The post was very flattering, but alas, I must come clean. I did not write the ad in question. I found it on Craigslist NY. At the time it never occurred to me that people might take me seriously and actually think that I wrote the ad. See, in it the writer rants relentlessly about being ASIAN, which I am clearly not. Saying it was my ad was done tongue-in-cheek. Too bad it's not online anymore, because it was quite a rant.

Meeting of the Minds

If any other Memphis Bloggers out there are interested, Mike Hollihan, of the famed Half-Bakered blog, will be setting up a meeting for all of the bloggers in the area. It's gonna be at the Blue Monkey, June 16th at 6:30. Stop by if ya want.

Farenheit 9/11

Well, if you haven't checked out the trailer yet for the new movie from Michael Moore, and if you're interested, it's out.

Just sayin'

Please don't send me hate comments.

Best. Day. In A While.

Can I just tell you about the best day I have had in a long time?

This afternoon I met Nathan and Brad at Theaterworks and saw The New Adventures of Hansel and Gretel. I can't even convey to you how great it was. Let me just tell you, Brad Troxel is one of the most talented artists I have ever had the pleasure of knowing. His sets and costumes were beyond words. He is going places, folks, remember his name. Actually, the entire play was fabulous from beginning to end, from Jerry's inspired words, to the actors, to the one-man-band. I wish today wasn't the closing performance or I would be telling everyone I know to go see it.

After the show, I went to The Bayou and had a great conversation on the patio with Nathan. We talked about our videogame obsessions and straight man decorating dilemnas. Later, I went and met the girls at The Blue Monkey Downtown for a wine tasting. There was this guy there that was trying hard to educate us about how to classify and distinguish, but we were yammering so much we missed most of it.

We moved to Swig later, and although the place was dead, we took it as an opportunity to talk up the cute bartender, El-Jay. We told stories, we laughed, we objectified the men, it was great.

I had a great day, and to top it all off, I came home and got to hear new Ryan Adam's songs. WOW! Now, I am going to watch the final episode of The Soprano's on InDemand. Damn, I love technology!

Holy Crap!

There's some new unreleased music on the Ryan Adam's website. Not all of the songs are new though. Some of them are older songs, but some are definitely not on any of his albums. I have no idea where they came from or what the deal is, but it's just a little special gift.

If you want to see the dfference in his styles, listen to "Good-Bye Honey" and then listen to "Lash Out." He's the perfect mixture of Graham Nash and Fugazi.

Carry on.

PJ Party

Saturday night I attended the Naughty After Nine Pajama Party at TJ Muligan's in Cordova. I don't ususally hang out in Dirty Dova, but my friend is dating a guy that plays in The Plaintiffs and I wanted to meet him and check out the band. They're actually really great for a bar band. They play covers, and it definitely appeals to mostly an older crowd, but I wasn't too good to get up and get my boogie on. I also got to meet the singer from Transit. He sat in with the band and played fiddle, or violin, we debated the correct terminology. He was definitely the highlight of my night. Of course, he's cute, young and in a band, so that's pretty much a roadmap for disaster. But a fun ride.

What Are You Talking ABOOT?

I read a very funny post today about the english language and pronunciation. It's amusing how everyone thinks that the way they were taught as a child to do or say something has to be the right way. Kind of like religion.

When I lived in the north, people never ceased to point out my "southernisms" like asking someone to flip off a light instead of turning it off or if I said I was fixin' to do something instead of saying I was about to. Of course, I didn't like a lot of phrases that they used either. I hated it when people would ask me if I was on line. I stand in a line, not on it.

The thing is, if you already like the person speaking, hearing their accent and the different terminology and phrases they use is fun and interesting. If they get on your nerves, it's excruciating.

SUNDAY MEME

List five phrases that will guarantee you will get twice the number of normal page hits tomorrow:

1. Anna Kournikova Naked
2. Ronald Reagan Dead
3. Creed Break-Up
4. Jennifer Lopez Marries
5. Lindsay Lohan Implants

Moment of Clarity

I know that I have mentioned my love for the Polyphonic Spree before. Their music is big, bold, and beautiful. I try to overlook the thought of them all living in a house somewhere waiting for the spaceship to come pick them up.

They have this really clever flash game on their website that lets you sample their upcoming album and makes you flex your brain muscle by doing a little mental yoga. If my life were a movie I would want them to score it.

Quote of the Day

"Not all those who wander are lost." J.R.R. Tolkien

Here's to Barristas Everywhere

While sitting on the patio at Melange last night, my companions and I spied a plethora of, well, let's just say interesting groups of folks. We pondered whether it was a full moon. Everyone knows that things get crazy when there's a full moon. One person I know got a full on crazy phone call that I would love to spill the beans on, but alas, I promised I wouldn't. I even recieved a couple of crazy phone calls myself, actually, they weren't so much crazy as drunk.

Anyway, we had lots of fun and I got to meet Alan who I just adore. His accent is the cutest thing ever. We all lusted after our waiter, Garrett, all night and collectively tried to will his clothes off. I guess our powers were not focused enough though, because we couldn't even get him to remember to bring us our drinks. Well, you know what I say, "Try, try again."

Thursday Night Fever

I had a very nice conversation with my boss tonight about my future. I respect her very much and feel like a dufus when I try to assert my motivations and ideas to her, but that's normal right?

Anyway, we had drinks and brie at Le Chardonnay and I confessed my ambitions and a few other things. I think we see eye-to-eye and she's been very supportive even when her hands are tied in terms of letting me pursue my destiny. But just having someone believe in you is enough sometimes.

Later in the evening I met up with Mark, Jason, Carlos and Jeremy at Swig and got the inside track on Guys Night Out (hope I didn't mess up anybody's play, ya'll). We drank Soprano's and tooled around mid-town, eventually ending up at Stop 345 for limeless drinks. I wanted to join in on the adventure to the strip club, I really did, but alas, I had to be responsible and grab some sleep before work in th morning. It sucks being old and responsible.

Happy Birthday Eric!

I went to Eric Colletta's birthday shindig at Brookhaven Pub tonight. If you're looking for a place that serves strong drinks, look no further. It was a pretty low-key evening, I think a lot of people stayed away because of the rain, and a lot of us had to be at work in the morning. These are all people that I've known since I was around 14, so it's quite different to hear everybody talk about their jobs and having to go home early in order to make it in on time. Remember back in the day when you could stay out until 4 AM and still make it to your 8 AM class? Yeah, me neither...

It was fun though, I got to hear about the album Chris is making with his band, The Secret Weapon, and other recent exciting events in his and Micah's life. I am gonna go down and hang out with him at Easley Studios while they're recording. I've always wanted to see how a record gets made. Maybe they'll let me move some dials around.

Obligatory Shout-Out

There's another new kid on the Memphis blog block that I should have mentioned before, but to tell you the truth, I'm still trying to figure them out. It's called Thursday Night Fever. I think they're still figuring out their focus.

I mean do Captain T and Mr. Roboto live in Memphis or Nashville? Are they college kids or more mature specimens? Is their blog a playa's guide or a nightlife guide? Do they plan barhopping parties for the general public and if so, where's my invite?

...and who is this Herman Beans?

Ladies and Gentlemen...

May I introduce you to Herman Beans?

It's gonna be big, it's gonna be great and it's gonna be a riot. Just you wait (that's a lot of hype to live up to huh?).

This new blog makes my day just as much as hearing Janice Broach singing Toxic to herself at her desk today.

Those two things are way more closely related that you would ever believe.

I Like Cold Beverages

Tonight I went out and had beverages with Nathan. We had one of those philisophical conversations that's as satisfying as Country Fried Steak with Gravy. HMMMM, HMMMM, GOOD!

People always ask where I get some of the stories and links that I write about on my blog, well, lately it's been from him. We have the same sense of humor. Tonight I promised to never tell him that he is wrong about anything. Well, we'll see how long that lasts ;) I sort of have a problem with that. But, I'm working on it! More news on his big plans later!

Fairytale Ending

Mr Jon Sparks gave The New Adventures of Hansel and Gretel a pretty spiffy review in the Commercial Appeal, in addition to some more nice things he said on his blog. My friend Brad worked on designing the sets and costumes. I am definitely going to try to go see it before it closes next week. I actually sat in on a meeting at Sidestreet when he and Jerry discussed what they wanted things to look like, so now I have to go to see how their vision turned out. You should too!

Kickstart My Art

Remember when I wrote that I would post the pictures from Artrageous? Well, I kind of slacked on dealing with them, sometimes it just be's that way, ya know? A lot of them were really blurry. So, if you were there and I snapped your pic and it isn't posted, it's not a dis, the pic just turned out bad. Sorry!

Anyway, they're finally up in the Gallery. Feel free to peruse at will. As always, much love to Patrik for helping me get things working. He's the bomb!